From that first little taste of hiking, I knew I was in trouble.

Immediately following my inaugural climb on Garcia Trail, I drove directly to a large mountaineering outfitter and melted my credit card. Climbing specific boots, convertible hiking pants, special socks, purpose built ‘mountaineering’ jackets and, of course, a goofy looking hiking hat became the latest additions to my ‘everything for everything’ collection. For good measure, my wife Fiona got fully outfitted as well.

The following week, Fiona and I hike the Whiskey Flat trail in Kernville, CA; a mislabeled trail that is not flat and to my dismay does not contain any whiskey at all.


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Categories : Hiking
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Owen slaps his hands over my eyes once again, and bursts into another giggle fit. It’s impossible to be annoyed at my three year old nephew, perched on my shoulders for added ‘training weight’ as we climb an insanely steep trail.

Owen Riding To The Top

“Buddy,” I grunt, “if you keep doing that, we might just fall off this mountain!” This statement elicits even more giggles from my passenger.

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First off, I should probably say that the APC Rally, which I still owe a write-up about, did not kill me like many people thought it must have.

Things never go exactly the way you’d hope, and the APC Rally was no exception. But I survived the experience. I know that’s a bit vague. When I write the ride report, it will make more sense.

Yours Truly on the Kangaroo Crushing DR-650

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No really, I mean it this time…

Categories : Motorcycle
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APC Rally – Prologue

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The APC Rally officially begins tomorrow from Wisemans Ferry in Australia, but for me it really began on Wednesday.

Frantically packing, checking and rechecking that I had everything I need, then rushing to the airport only to sit for an hour on a gigantic airplane next to a fat guy that reeked of rotting fish while the weight planners for the airline figured out how to make the plane safe to take off.

My suggestion to the illustrious weight planners was to remove Mr. Dead Fish, but that suggestion was ignored. Instead they made the last two rows move forward. And somehow that made the plane safe to take off.

Three days later, we landed, my riding buddy Dan met me at Sydney airport, and we immediately went to pick up my rally bike. I’d been in touch with the rental company oh… I’d say about a billion times… pestering them to make sure the brake pads were new, the tires were new, the tubes were new, the bearings were good, ect. Every response was an enthusiastic “OK! No Problem, Mate!”

When I arrived to pick up my trusty ride, I learned my first bit of Australian slang. “Ok! No Problem, Mate!” actually means, “Fuck off. I ain’t gonna do it, mate.”

After a bunch of haggling, I left with my trusty ride, complete with new tires, new brake pads, and questionable wheel bearings. A few hours of general bullshitting and bike loading followed. My trusty ride, a nice, beat-to-hell-already Suzuki DR650 was transformed from a regular beater bike to an APC Rally worthy beater bike.

Proudly Flying The Flag of the Kingdom of Rhode Island

I learned from the rally organizer that I am the first American to participate in the APC Rally, which is kind of cool. Hopefully I will be the first American to complete the APC Rally as well.

We are off for the ride of a lifetime tomorrow at oh-dark-thirty, which is Australian slang for too fucking early! really looking forward to adding to my Aussie vocabulary.

My personal SPOT Tracker Page: Frenchy’s APC Rally SPOT Page

The Entire Rally SPOT Tracker Page: APC Rally SPOT Page

Updates will be sporadic to non-existent. My plan is to enjoy every minute of this ride, then write up a bunch of lies about how great I rode throughout when I am safely back at Blogger Central.

Categories : Motorcycle
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