The frenetic pace of work has slowed my on-bike training. Right now I am finishing up a string of shows in Liverpool. In the last month alone, I have flown over four quadrillion miles, with only fifteen quintillion more miles to go until the year ends.

All that travel doesn’t mean I have stopped training though. On November 1st, a few of my friends and I started a running contest called, creatively enough, ‘Just Because.’

Whoever runs the most miles in November wins the contest… well… just because.

Full disclosure: I hate running. I would rather go to the dentist in a third world country than strap on a pair of Nikes and dart about on foot. I mean, that is exactly why motorcycles were invented in the first place, to stop all this senseless running around on foot, right? That’s why evolution is a good thing.

My other problem  (some would argue one of my MANY other problems) is I am competitive. Highly. Though I don’t like to run, I do like to win. Even a contest that exists… just because.

In the two months since I have been a ‘runner’ I have learned one thing about running. It’s stupidly easy. All you have to do when you are running is not stop running. Simple.

All this running around will have me completely prepared to shred the Warrior Dash in December. Yes, there will be pictures, videos blog posts, and all manner of goofiness on that day. Though it hasn’t happened yet, in my mind I have already shredded that puny 5K race with puny obstacles, and already need a new, harder goal. So, while I was out running the other day, I decided my next challenge will be the Los Angeles Half Marathon in January.

Then, after that, who knows? Maybe a triathlon, if they allow water wings for the swimming part, and motors for the bicycling part. And possibly – though this one will take some finesse with the fiancee – a dirt bike enduro race. Never raced a motorcycle before, so this idea is a little frightening, even to me. Surely the last place finisher receives some kind of trophy, or at least a booby prize, so I am assured of winning something!

I’ve also been posing for pictures that make it look as though I have been working out. Here are a few photos from my latest photo shoot in Liverpool, UK.

Yes, I work out with tea kettles. All real men do!

Thanks to Rob of Diverse Health and Fitness, Mark at Psycho Gym in Dallas, Dianne at Condition Kettlebells in Atlanta and of course, Pete at Bodyarmour Fitness in the Kingdom of Rhode Island. All these brave people have dodged flying objects as they attempt to train Mongo the Motorcycle Guy how to get stronger. It’s a uphill battle for sure, but one that each trainer has fought courageously.

In my tiny brain, all this running and lifting and swinging is my way of preparing for the stresses and endurance of the 7000+ km of  off-road riding during the APC Rally in July. I’ve dropped thirty pounds since I started this regimen, and as much as I hate to admit it, I am starting to kind of like it. I haven’t felt this good in years, and I can finally fit into my ‘skinny jeans’ again!

Author: frenchy