Frenchy's Rant

Hey! You!

Yeah, you! In Amsterdam!!

Who are you?

And you, over there in New Zealand???

Or mein Freund von Deutschland?

How about it? How’d you end up here?

Stateside too!!

Georgia? Cali? DC?

C’mon Faithful Fifteen! Drop me a line at frenchys-rant@att.net and introduce yourselves!

Well, it was bound to happen eventually. All good things must come to an end, thus, my cone experiment has officially concluded. I scientificially postulated it might be over yesterday as I watched someone from the building observe the cone, then lift it up. He tested the light spot underneath to see if it was wet, pondered it’s true meaning a while longer, then he put the cone right back where it was. The experiment continued!

This morning when I came in for the last day of basketball broadcasting this week, the cone had finally been moved. I suppose someone from -Mgmt. noticed it last night and said, “What da hell is this fuckin’ cone doin’ heah anyway?” Then the knuckle-dragging science-hater probably kicked my little experiment into the corner.

I could put it back, but I feel that after three days, the cone has lost the majority of it’s scientific (and entertainment) value. Now if I can only find a Groundhog or two to blow up, I think I’ll make it through the day.

By now, everyone has seen those big red “EASY” buttons. Press the EASY button, and a little voice says “That was easy.” Funny for about a minute, but then it gets old.

After checking on my ongoing cone experiment (still unmoved at 3:30!) and failing to find any Groundhogs to torch, I needed something to keep me from slipping into a boredom induced coma today. Mustering a little bit of energy, I noticed a button on my audio console that was almost interesting. (Bear with me, I’m BOOORED!)

Here is the console, a Calrec Alpha series. Without getting into a lot of boring technical details, this audio console has a lot of buttons. Press one wrong button, and you can erase your whole set up. Fun.

And no, not one single button is labeled EASY. However, there is one button whose function is somewhat of a mystery:

Right next to the IN and INTER buttons, sits the mysterious ASS button. I don’t know what it does, and since I’m afraid to press it, I probably never will.

Day two of my little experiment finds the cone with the DO NOT MOVE sign – unmoved!

Whew! Being a scientist is tough work, but the cats (and Groundhogs) are safe, at least for now…