For the first time ever, I watched a sporting event as a fan. The game pitted the weak-seeming San Antonio Spurs against the dominant Dallas Mavericks. All that needed to happen was one more win for the Mavericks, who controlled the series 3-1, and I wouldn’t have to fly to Dallas to cover the next game. Thus my interest in the game.

While I knew that Dallas would lose the whole time, I held out hope for my new favorite team. I cheered, I swore at the TV, I even considered placing a huge bet on San Antonio, all in an effort to help them lose the game. If I didn’t have to work the game, I would be able to go on a great motorcycle ride, in weather that, almost mockingly, had cleared after record rainfall.

The Mavericks at one point were down by ten, and I realized what it was like to be an actual sports fan. I have been working sporting events for almost twelve years now, but I honestly couldn’t care less about teams, players and sports in general. I usually just root for the clock, hoping for no sudden death overtime.

Not so during this game. I quickly despised any San Antonio player that could make a shot, I yelled at the Maverics when they dropped the fucking ball or missed the basket. I cheered, I got upset. I was absorbed by the game, despite myself.

And with less than a minute to go, the score was separated by one point, in San Antonio’s favor. So this is why people care about sports! It’s EXCITING!

And at the end of the game, the score remained the same. San Antonio won, the Mavericks lost, and I would have to work. FUCK! This is why I hate sports. It’s DISAPPOINTING! I am no longer a fan.

And for losing, and more importantly ruining a great motorcycle ride, which is FAR, FAR too long overdue, I am happy to award a GFY award to the Mavericks, my new LEAST favorite team.

Congratulations, losers!

Author: frenchy